Being brave
I know I'm not brave when it comes to certain things. I hate making calls to the government, applying for jobs or talking to teachers on the phone. I get shy and weird about it. But when people start talking about me not being brave at ALL I have the right to get upset.
I could tell you all about the brave choices I've made. I could tell you about the decision to keep a baby, knowing I was going to raise it myself. I could tell you about all the choices around that and all the things I've had to do to make it work.
I could tell them about having my heart broken but still believing in love and going all in, waiting for that river-card with a cold sweat and my heart beating way too fast. I could tell them about being scared but doing it anyways ‘cause I'm brave enough to make it work.
I could tell you about quitting work and start studying again. Turning my back on easy, but little, money to get my intelligence valuated and put down on a piece of paper to give me and the little one a better future.
Well, I could tell you that, but I wont. I wont brag about being braver than most. I wont brag about being the best I can be even though all the responsibility scares me. But one day I'll have someone to share it with, I will have what I want because I fight for it and I put my heart and my feelings on the line. I never want to look back thinking "What if"...
Now That's being brave.
I'm there in the background, I like it that way these days.
